Family

Robert P. George in this lecture discusses polyamory, throuples, and how they affect marriage and the family.

How important is love in marriage? Most people would almost instinctively answer this question by saying that love is very important to successful marriages. However, such an answer assumes that each of us knows what is meant by the word “love.” Although we use the word love all the time when we talk about couple and marriage relationships, we rarely are clear about what exactly we mean when we say that someone is “in love” or “loves someone”. In fact, many young adults today struggle in their dating efforts because love is seen as some sort of state of existence or intense feeling that they can’t quite explain, but they are sure they will know it when they see it. Part of our current cultural confusion about love comes from the fact that there are different types and expressions of love. We use the term “love” to describe our relationship to our spouse, but we also use the term “love” in referring to our grandma and our newborn baby daughter. We also say that we “love” double fudge chocolate ice-cream and getting a foot massage. Clearly our relationship with our spouse should involve a different type of love than our love for ice-cream or the “love” we felt for that pretty girl in our math class in 9th grade. In order to better understand love, we need to appreciate that there are different types of love. Furthermore, we must understand that some types of love are better than others in forming and maintaining a strong marriage relationship. In fact, the type of love a marriage is based on will be one of the most important determinants of whether the relationship will last or not. Marriages based on mature love will last. Marriages built upon immature love will not. It is as simple as that.

The current debate over the definition of marriage is typically portrayed as a decision about whether to “expand” or “extend” marriage to include same-sex couples. This argument, however, assumes that the basic nature of marriage will remain largely unchanged by granting marriage status to same-sex partnerships. It implies that all this policy change would do is absorb same-sex partnerships within the existing boundaries of marriage, thus extending the benefits of marriage to a wider segment of society. Indeed, the very term “same-sex marriage” implies that same-sex couples in committed relationships are already a type of marriage that should be appropriately recognized and labeled as such. This understanding is deeply flawed. It fails to recognize how defining same-sex partnerships as marriages would fundamentally change both how marriage is collectively understood and the primary social purposes for which it exists.

J. Budziszewski, a professor of government and philosophy at University of Texas at Austin, spoke about the unique characteristics of sex and how the gender qualities compliment one another.

Jason Carroll, professor at Brigham Young University, presents three key fragmentations occurring in our cultural understandings of marriage, claiming that these fragmentations are transforming how we prepare for a successful, loving, and lasting marital relationship.

W. Bradford Wilcox, professor at the University of Virginia, presents scientific evidence showing the positive effects of marriage on men's lives.

Sam Sturgeon, senior research manager at Bonneville Communications, investigates the decline of the family in recent years, citing diminishing marital roles as one element behind the decline, as well as the loss of moral authority.

Scott Stanley, professor at the University of Denver, discusses why and how commitment develops in relationships and investigates the problems with cohabitation.

Jason Carroll, professor at Brigham Young University, shares relationship advice for young single adults, discussing the importance of timing in relationships, the problematic increase in cohabitations, and the sexual chemistry paradox.